It's funny that certain things come up in your life on their anniversary dates.

@badpatient just tweeted a video of the Dresden Dolls doing a cover of PJ Harvey's Rid of Me. If you don't know PJ (I should find you, shake you soundly and give you a mix CD) what you don't know is that Rid of Me is the single most obsessive break up/love song ever recorded. Seriously, listen to the lyrics and listen to her play it live. She effing blows my mind.

I watched the video and it's awesome (go to my facebook to see it, i'm too lazy to snag the link again.) and it transported me back to a place and time in which I was crazy, stupid and broken hearted.

The last time my ex and I split was in June/July. I remember sitting in her kitchen after she'd avoided me for about a week, I waited for the bombshell that I knew was coming. Instead of the expected bombshell I got the "I'd like to see other people."* I shocked her by breaking into tears.*** She pressed on with her explanation of why. I continued to cry. It was one of those break ups you expect and see it coming for awhile and frankly it was long past due. She fully expected me to tell her sure I'd like to see you while you see other women. I again shocked her by saying that I don't share well and no. She cried and asked me to think about it. I reiterated no.

I felt strangely free after those words were said.****

I went home and made her a mix CD, well, after visiting a friend and drinking a few celebratory beers. The last song was Rid of Me. She didn't get it. She called me up to tell me she didn't get it and called the CD weird. Sigh. She missed the point entirely. Rid of Me is about obsessive, heart wrenching, gut churning love and breaking up. It's the raw cheated on broken heart. Rid of Me is the aftermath of love that should never have been.

The funny part about this is, though my ex didn't GET Rid of Me***** and thought it was weird she definately suffered from what I now refer to as "Rid of Me" syndrome: post break up insanity. Which is a whole otherset of stories, which I'll not share here as I know my ex, or her grilfriend read the blog on occasion.**

*I'd like to point out that "I'd like to see other people is "breaking up lite." All the break up but without the spine.

** Yes, ladies, I can see your IP address. Frankly I don't check them unless I see something that comes up from certain areas of Maine, namely the 2 cities/towns I know you 2 have homes in. As I don't have readers  in those areas by process of elimination it's got to be you.

*** Rolls Eyes, I'm the butch I'm not supposed to cry, except I'm not butch and don't ID that way.

**** This was 2002 and shortly before I had the best summer of my life thus far as I worked PT and painted all day and sold my art via ebay.

*****I'm addicted to footnotes. I decided after that I can't date anyone who doesn't know or can't get PJ. Christie GETS PJ. She's a keeper.